The War On Christmas!
Monday, December 13, 2010
It's on, people. The War On Christmas is officially here.
Our friendly, loving, and accepting neighbors over at the American Family Association (the same folks who believe that there should be legal sanctions against homosexual behavior) have provided us with a list of companies who are either strictly against Christmas, completely for Christmas, or all Switzerland-y in regards to Christmas.
For the sake of keeping you lazy bastards from clicking too many links, the list of Anti-Christmas Agressors includes:
--Banana Republic (NEW!)
--Barnes & Noble
--CVS Pharmacy
--Foot Locker
--Gap Stores (NEW!)
--Hancock Fabrics
--NASCAR
--L.L. Bean (NEW!)
--Office Depot
--Radio Shack
--Staples
--SUPERVALU
--Victoria's Secret
Some of these I can see. Banana Republic is an affront to common-sense fashion if ever there was, and Barnes & Noble encourages us to read books other than The Bible. But Victoria's Secret?? The gifts purchased there certainly encourage straight, monogamous, traditional scrumping. What gives?? And NASCAR? What am I supposed to watch on tv??
But at least we have Best Buy and Wal Mart there right by our side in defense of Christmas. I feel encouraged that if I can't get high-quality-but-certainly-atheist Victoria Secrets lingerie to spur my Christmas Eve monkey sex fest, I can get a less expensive knock-off from Wal Mart and have enough money to maybe buy a cheap video camera from Best Buy. And then, I can create more troops to fight this War On Christmas.
