There Goes The Neighborhood

Monday, January 03, 2011

Well, great.

According Marie Exley, the world will apparently begin to end on May 21, 2011. On that day, true believers will be enraptured.

If there had been time, Marie Exley would have liked to start a family. Instead, the 32-year-old Army veteran has less than six months left, which she'll spend spreading a stark warning: Judgment Day is almost here.

Exley is part of a movement of Christians loosely organized by radio broadcasts and websites, independent of churches and convinced by their reading of the Bible that the end of the world will begin on May 21, 2011.
I love the sanctimonious part of the article:
"A lot of people might think, 'The end's coming, let's go party,'" said Exley, a veteran of two deployments in Iraq. "But we're commanded by God to warn people. I wish I could just be like everybody else, but it's so much better to know that when the end comes, you'll be safe."
This all comes from Cult Leader minister Harold Camping. He has thus far convinced people to stop working and join RV caravans to drive around the country telling people just how screwed we are and they aren't, unless they believe Camping's prediction.
Camping, 89, believes the Bible essentially functions as a cosmic calendar explaining exactly when various prophecies will be fulfilled.

The retired civil engineer said all his calculations come from close readings of the Bible, but that external events like the foundation of the state of Israel in 1948 are signs confirming the date.

"Beyond the shadow of a doubt, May 21 will be the date of the Rapture and the day of judgment," he said.

The doctrine known as the Rapture teaches that believers will be taken up to heaven, while everyone else will remain on earth for a period of torment, concluding with the end of time. Camping believes that will happen in October.

"If May 21 passes and I'm still here, that means I wasn't saved. Does that mean God's word is inaccurate or untrue? Not at all," Warden said.
I love that last paragraph above. Just because it looks like I'm wrong, I'm not wrong. I'm right.

For me, it'll mean Smitty Jr has a really really shitty 6th birthday 22 days later, which is total bullshit. It also means that I will certainly lose the deposit on whatever venue we choose for Smitty Jr's 6th, which is also bullshit.

But I do have hope. Rare ATK Contributor Joel got me this book for Christmas, so at least I can survive the apocalypse. I assume Joel will too, who will certainly demand I lend him back the book he gifted me. So the blog will live on, even if it's not in cyberspace. So we have that going for us. And that's nice. I wonder if Jesus reads this blog...

5 comments:

steves 3:04 PM  

PLease explain to me why this kind of BS gets any kind of attention. Every year for the last 2000+ years has some kind of movement that talks about this. Heck, one of the NT books deals with this because God/Jesus was so annoyed that people thought he was going to come any day now.

G/J even goes on to explain that the world will end when it ends, not when some mouth breathing, cousin marrying, dip shit says so.

But I do have hope. Rare ATK Contributor Joel got me this book for Christmas

I don't know what to make of that book. I hope he got a good deal on it.

Smitty 4:01 PM  

I think it gets attention because it's hilarious.

I hope he got a good deal on it.

It's a very very funny book. Tongue in cheek. Good for some light reading and laughs.

However, this article has inspired me. In April, I will brew a beer with a massive alcohol content. It will ferment and be ready by...May 21, at which time I will unveil me Apocalypse Ale. I can't wait.

Bob 5:08 PM  

"In April, I will brew a beer with a massive alcohol content. It will ferment and be ready by...May 21, at which time I will unveil me Apocalypse Ale."

Awesome. Issue a presser so we can make fun of the whackos and be drunk on May 22.

Monk-in-Training 7:29 AM  

How often do we humans want to put God in a box and control Him. It never works.

Apocalypse Ale? I expect a through review! :)

Monk-in-Training 10:03 PM  

You know.. I couldn't just let this go!

It is part of my confession of the Incarnation just recently celebrated in the belief that the Word was made flesh, that God entered this world as well as Heaven. He has redeemed us, and gives physicality to the Spirit.

Where did we get the idea that our souls will drift off into some Eternal spiritual realm, while God destroys what remains of humanity and this world, in some horrendous cataclysm?

The Scriptures teach, and from what we can see in the ancient Church, the Christian hope of eternity is immortality in our own fleshly bodies. We are to undergo a resurrection, like Jesus, the first fruits of that general rising to a new life, one that is worthy for both New Heaven and the New Earth.

I for one am looking forward to incorruptible flesh!

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