Don't Believe the Hype - Friday Beer Blog

I decided to give-in to the commercial hype and try some Budweiser Select. My overall impression: absolute boredom. Not disgust, not violent fits of rage, just boredom. Like your least favorite college class, or a staff meeting. Or Anna Karenina. No...worse. Wuthering Heights boring.

The facts:

The beer poured a pale yellow, worse than the pale yellow of last week's post. More like hard-water yellow. Mineral water yellow. Just pale and transparent. It didn't have so much of a head to it as simply lacing on top of the beer. Normally, lacing is reserved for the sides of the glass. Not so with this beer. Consider this beer's head more of a comb-over than a real head.

What did I smell? I think CO2. I think there was ahint of adjunct, like corn. I could not discern any grain. So what did I smell? Nothing, really. I smelled the smell of boredom. Like a house with no cookies in the oven. Like a hospital room.

I could go all-out and include words to describe the taste like "crisp," "sharp," and "bite," but that's all there is. Nothing unique, especially for a mass-produced beer. Honestly, when I compared it to regular Bud, I tasted no difference. Imagine the joy you get out of drinking filtered, room-temperature water. That's the joy I got here. I tasted some roasted corn. I tasted some carbonated water. What I truly tasted is a total lack of character. This beer is that guy at work who doesn't tell jokes and eats cheese sandwiches by himself at lunch. This beer is the person whose idea of a good time is putting together a puzzle of puppy dogs. Rice cakes with no topping.

So they found another way to market really boring beer. This is a total sleeper. It is so boring that I can't even come up with a clever post. It is just plain milquetoast backed by a multi-million-dollar ad campaign. Zzzzz....