Parenting Advice from a Single Guy

Thursday, November 08, 2007

In the spirit of Smitty's newest additions-to-be, I figured I would pass along my best piece of parenting advice. I have no children, and I am not planning to in the near future. I have one very cute nephew, however, and I have learned a few things from watching him.

  • Rule #1: Do not give your child GHB. You would think that one would be self-explanatory. But apparently not.
  • Rule #2: Finding the right gift for your child's birthday can be difficult. Don't be afraid to think... um... outside the box?
  • Rule #3: Do NOT give birth to twins on the day Daylight Savings Time begins. It just causes problems.

That's all I know. But I feel like it's a good start.

3 comments:

steves 7:38 AM  

I think that is excellent advice. I think that we have become overly dependent on Chinese goods. I'd love to say that I am going to boycott stuff made there until they get there act together, but that would be impossible. What is their problem? We have gotten cheap, foreign goods from other places. I have shirts made in Vietnam. I have stuff that was made in Taiwan, the Philippines, Mexico, etc. I have never seen this level of stupidity. If I were paranoid, I'd say they were doing this on purpose.

As for the stripper, didn't she maybe wonder if it was appropriate to perform in a school? I thought all strippers were stripping to pay for med school or phD's. Shouldn't they know better?

B Mac 11:18 AM  

Now, let's not be too harsh on Mercedes (or Lexus, or Charity, or whatever her name is). If she spends her days as a student and her evenings with dollar bills in her underwear... How easy would it be to forget WHICH setting she was in?

Bob "Chief Beer Brewing Extravaganza Advocate" 4:57 PM  

Speaking of strippers and kids...

You know what sucks?

When you are out for an evening of booze and strippers and the stripper introduces herself with your DAUGHTER'S name. Total buzzkill.

This really happened to me. Shouldn't have been there anyway.

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